The Church has long been against co-habitation, i.e. “living together” before you get married. Unfortunately labelled “living in sin” (not that there aren’t 9 gazillion other ways to “live in sin”), this practice has been frowned upon by the Church because very often “living together” is code for “having sex,” and fornication has long been on the hit list.
Well, many voices have also been pointing out that this co-habitating just isn’t healthy; it’s actually not good or helpful relationally for the co-habitators and their possible (or scheduled) plans to wed. Unfortunately, way too many couples disagree, resist, or refuse to comply with the pastors, churches, or others who give such counsel. Perhaps even more unfortunate is the numbers of marraiges that are perfomed without any consideration for such issues. (Every church should have a pastor like Charlie in Greenwood, IN! Love you, Bro!)
Well, I just ran across this article that has some very interesting stats worth reading. Turns out that studies really are showing that in fact, couples that live together are more likely to break up, and/or get a divorce if they do get married. This is something that I think we need to wrestle with as believers, as the Church, and especially as those who “perform” weddings (you “pastor”-types in the crowd). We’ve just GOT to address some of these issues with people, not for the sake of legalism (“thou shalt not live together”) but for the sake of health and love and truth. We’re not helping anyone, and may in fact be hurting people, by not teaching and modelling a different and better and healthier way. Any thoughts out there?